Grown don't mean nothing to a mother. A child is a child. They get bigger, older, but grown? What's that suppose to mean? In my heart it don't mean a thing. ~Toni Morrison, Beloved, 1987
To my mother we were always "the girls"... when she was frustrated with us we were "You girls!". We always laughed when she grouped us together; we are after all 64, 60, 56 and 53 year old girls! We have spent the last few days looking at family photos and realizing how beautiful our mother was as a young woman...really beautiful, with laughter all around her. She was a complicated person; a mystery to me.... She grew up in an age when people didn't share their feelings or their issues; goodness gracious, I must have been a puzzle to her, too! She probably didn't get my career choice (therapist) at all!
Isn't that all irrelevant now; my wanting to be understood by my mother! The last days before she passed away, I got it! I got the final lesson she had to teach me...she didn't need to understand me, she just loved me, deeply loved me and with that knowledge I feel peace.